Harpo Jaeger dot com

Silverware

While preparing a tall mug of tea, I had some interesting thoughts about silverware. We have a bunch of different sets of silverware all mixed up in my house, so when using utensils one is presented with a conundrum. Do we specifically select which utensil from which set is preferable, or do we surrender ourselves to random chance and just grab one? I would argue that it is best to choose, as I have discovered that the different sets tend to be useful for different things.

First of all, some of the sets are simply bigger and bulkier than the others. These tend to be good for serving food. However, the spoons from one of the thicker sets are also my first choice for cereal, soup, yogurt, and almost all liquid dishes. The exception is hot drinks, which need to be stirred. Tea requires a long-handled heavy teaspoon. It is important that it be a teaspoon to allow for the proper amount of honey. And if it is not long-handled and from one of of the heavy sets, it will overheat quickly and become useless for stirring, as it will be too hot to touch. Other hot drinks do not necessarily require a teaspoon, as they usually just need to be stirred. But it is still important to use a heavy set, as the same thermal restrictions apply.

The various butter knives are entirely interchangeable. However, we have two sets of sharp table knives, one that is distinctly steakish, and one that is sort of para-steakish. The steakish set is sharper and more heavily serrated, so I find it especially useful for bagels, where I can use the same utensil to first cut the bagel and then spread cream cheese. This then requires the invocation of a fork for lox and onions, but this is a matter I will deal with shortly. The para-steak-knives are somewhat jacks-of-all-trades. They can be used as butter knives in a pinch, but also work fairly well for cutting, especially fruit.

Forks are somewhat more straightforward. I always prefer the smallest forks from one of the light sets. The heavier ones are just not accurate enough to be used when eating. I find it difficult to eat anything with anything as large and non-dexterous as these. Good for spearing potatoes, perhaps, but not for the delicate task of conveying food to my mouth.

Clearly, there’s a lot of depth to this topic. It seems petty, but I think that my thought process on this matter represents a lot of the way I think about things like efficiency. I.e. is it useful for me to use a specific type of silverware over another in a certain situation, or is a waste of my time to even be thinking about it?

Perhaps I will continue in the future with a discussion of our similarly fragmented glass, plate, and bowl populations.